Transcendence therapists and coaches will tell you that having emotional experiences (anger, anxiety, shame, etc) means that you’re unhealed or that you have more work to do- somatics, psychedelics, workshops (only $6k this week!!!), and beyond. • However, what is needed is to drop into the emotional experience and make friends with the so-called “negative emotions”. Healing isn’t about feeling nothing. Healing is about accepting all of our parts and emotions and facilitating a new compassionate, accepting relationship with our suffering. Dropping out of the duality of good and bad and loving ourselves and our experience without judgment. ••••• You don’t need more self-love or worth- you are already full of it, your worth is inherent, and you need to remember this and who you are as a loving expression of the Universe itself. You’re worth isn’t up for question and it isn’t up for sale- just because a meme or social media influencer, or mainstream therapist is out to collect your $s by telling you that you lack worth. The only reason you don’t have worth or self-love is because you’ve been sold the idea that you’re worthless. Stop telling yourself that story and remember who you are. Watch out for pop culture psychologists who want to sell you something that “heals” you based on lack and something being “wrong” with basic human emotions. Your emotions are valuable teachers and they’re not just going to go away if you do yoga, drop into your body, or regulate your nervous system. These tools are valuable to understanding yourself, creating more resilience, and decreasing reactivity, however, negative emotions such as anxiety will never fully disappear. All emotions are our greatest teachers, and when you develop a loving relationship with your suffering instead of trying to transcend the human experience you truly start to “heal” and love every part of yourself and your messy, human life. You are full of love, worth, and beauty, even with all of your chaos, pain, and so-called negative emotions, and you are already healed.
PSA- no, I am not invalidating those who experience deep pain, suffering, and ongoing symptoms of trauma trying to heal. Your experience is real. You’re not doing anything wrong. I am merely here to remind you that you’re already healed and that you don’t have to keep doing “the work”. You don’t need to do any more yoga, you don’t need any more workshops (unless you want to!). If you’ve already done the work for 5,10, 15 years and you still have “negative” emotions it’s not because you’re so damaged or traumatized or not trying hard enough, it’s because your human and healing culture is designed to make you feel like you failed to make you spend more money. A lot of these online coaches and teachers come from a place of lack. They’re trying to sell you something. They want to make human suffering profitable by telling you that you don’t love yourself, or that if you do this your anxiety or relationship issues will magically disappear. They won’t. What can change, however, is the way you relate to your suffering. When you allow and get curious about emotions as messengers, instead of repressing or aiming for transcendence, things finally change. I am reminding those lost in the shame, lack, and confusion cycles around their suffering, especially those who have done the work and spent the money and still suffer regardless, nothing is wrong with you, and it never was. Trauma, pain, and suffering are essentially fundamental to the human experience. Although we can find ways to make friends with our pain, oftentimes, no matter what is done, it remains. And then we hate ourselves and think we’re losers who are fundamentally flawed, we can’t “heal” no matter how hard we try. But guess what- “healing”, at least the way it’s sold by social media pop culture “psychologists” is a fantasy. And that’s why you’re not healing because you’re being sold a lie. Sometimes, also even by mainstream, licensed therapists and psychologists. “10 sessions of EMDR”, only $250 a session! When you’re done all trauma symptoms disappear!!! Another lie. “Try Somatic Experiencing” “Try Ayahuasca” “Try Psilocybin” Only $5k!!!! More capitalistic healing culture. All tools, not miracle cures. Please be kind to yourself and learn to identify opportunistic transcendence coaches and therapists. Instead of demanding more healing of yourself, and identifying all of the places where you’re “not good enough” or “not healed”, make friends with your suffering, give it a name, make it a home, and nurture all of that anxiety, hate, and worthlessness, make it your best friend. Stop running from and trying to cure your heartache. And then finally… you’re home. You’re full of love and worth. Your life changes (and your wallet is full).
#trauma #healing #healingculture #transcendence #influencers #pathology #selflove #worth #duality #nonduality #psychology #jungian #jameshillman #somatic #yoga #loveyourself #peace #truepeace #contrary #heyoka #empath #superempath
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